


sour apple baby (but you taste so sweet)

by theprincessdiarist



Series: she lives in daydreams with me [2]
Category: Grey's Anatomy
Genre: Aftercare, Consensual Kink, Dom/sub, F/F, Lesbian Sex, Pining, Plot What Plot/Porn Without Plot, Porn with Feelings, Praise Kink, Repressed Feelings, Smut, Vaginal Fisting, lots n lots of feelings Meredith is in LOVE
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-04
Updated: 2021-03-04
Packaged: 2021-03-16 12:15:48
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,061
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29700423
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theprincessdiarist/pseuds/theprincessdiarist
Summary: She is used to hard, quick sex, enjoys it, really. She likes riding and talking dirty and fast-paced orgasms. She isn’t used tothis,letting another person completely consume her. She fucks her girls,shemakes them shake and squirm and beg. And yet, here she is in an expensive hotel room, curled into Addison’s chest, begging her to let her come.
Relationships: Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery
Series: she lives in daydreams with me [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/2182737
Comments: 17
Kudos: 43





	sour apple baby (but you taste so sweet)

**Author's Note:**

> Hello again! This is a smutty hotel room tryst in Meredith's POV from 'who could ever leave me, darling? but who could stay? (you could stay.)' 
> 
> I absolutely loved writing that story and I wanted to explore more of what was happening on Meredith's side. This can totally be read without having read the other story though.
> 
> Enjoy! <3
> 
> Title from "Finally // beautiful stranger" by Halsey.

Meredith takes a look at herself in one of the hallway mirrors before stepping into the empty elevator. She presses her floor number and waits. She feels the pent up desperation from the morning coursing through her veins again, her mind going back to the delicious weight of Addison's thighs on her shoulders, the hard storage room floor under her knees, the hard tugs at her scalp. She curses her pager for going off just as Addison had pinned _her_ against a shelf.

The _ding_ makes her stomach tingle. She steps out. She always feels out of place in the big, expensive hallways of this place. It takes twenty-seven steps to reach her door (She doesn’t remember why she knows this, but she does.) Meredith tries to stifle the growing anticipation as she stands in front it. She told Izzie and Cristina that she was going to see Ellis. If Hell exists, Meredith has a first-class ticket to it.

She knocks twice and Addison immediately opens the door. She grabs Meredith's wrist and pulls her inside. Meredith's bag drops to the floor as Addison pins her against the door, her mouth biting down her neck as she unbuttons her jeans. Meredith hastily peels them off as Addison kisses her. She tears off Meredith's shirt, revealing her lacy brassiere (that she did _not_ wear specifically for Addison, Meredith tells herself again.) She preens at the soft gasp that escapes Addison's lips. She toys with its strap before helping Meredith take it off.

Meredith begins to untie Addison's shirt but she grips her wrist and pins it up next to her head. _Oh._

"Get on the bed," Addison's voice is hoarse against her neck and it sends a shiver through Meredith's body. Oh, so they're playing that game.

Meredith feels a loss of warmth when Addison steps back. She doesn't break eye contact as Meredith breathlessly moves to settle on the bed. Addison walks towards her slowly, almost predatory, like she’s going to devour Meredith and leave nothing behind. Meredith would let her. Meredith would let her do anything she wants.

Meredith is ready for her to get on top and fuck the life out of her, but she knows she has to wait. She hates waiting. She leans back against the soft headboard as Addison sits down at the edge of the bed. She extends her arm and toys with the edge of Meredith's underwear. Meredith heart thumps as she watches Addison's eyes darken.

"Take it off."

Meredith's breath hitches. She tugs her thumbs into the elastic and slowly peels off her panties. She throws them aside and lays back, her chest heaving and her legs lightly parted.

She feels a thrill down her spine at how utterly exposed she is, lying here naked while Addison isn't even out of her heels. She wishes Addison would take off her shirt, let Meredith see her.

"I want to see you," she husks as she leans forward.

Addison grips her wrists and pushes her back until she's on top of Meredith, straddling her hips, her hair falling around her face in a blazing red halo. Addison pins Meredith's wrists to either side of her head and brings her lips devastatingly close to Meredith's. Meredith breathlessly shuts her eyes, parts her lips in anticipation.

"Did I say you could touch me?"

Meredith feels a surge of heat in her belly. She opens her eyes and she shakes her head.

"Use that pretty mouth of yours," Addison whispers sharply. Her grip tightens on Meredith's wrists. "Did I say you could touch me?"

"N-no, you didn't," Meredith breathlessly lets out. She feels herself fucking dripping and Addison hasn't even touched her yet.

"Exactly," Addison replies, "So don't fucking move." She punctuates each word with a breathy kiss down her throat. Meredith feels her kick off her heels as she loosens her grip.

Addison begins travelling down her body, her lips ghosting over Meredith’s aching breasts, pressing a soft kiss to her belly (Meredith ignores the gentle flutter she feels.) until she is settled between Meredith’s thighs.

Meredith shifts, spreading her legs further. She feels hot breath against her aching cunt and Meredith is ready to beg, plead, anything for Addison to touch her. Her hips buck but Addison places a palm on her stomach and holds her down. She shoots a glare that only makes Meredith want to squirm further, get any sort of contact.

“Are you going to stop moving or do I need to tie you up?”

She says it so nonchalantly, like she’s asking Meredith her favorite ice-cream flavor, and it sends a shock of heat up Meredith’s spine. Her thighs tremble at the image of it; her wrists bound, completely at Addison’s mercy and for a second Meredith almost asks for it.

But then Addison finally, _finally_ brushes her thumb against Meredith and she groans in relief. She parts Meredith, softly blowing at her exposed flesh and looks up to meet her eyes. Meredith feels herself flush at the intimacy of it, the way she's lying so completely open for Addison.

"Beautiful," she whispers, stroking two fingers against Meredith's core.

Meredith whimpers. She wants to bury her hands in Addison's hair, tug and pull until her mouth is right where Meredith wants, but she exasperatedly keeps her hands right where Addison told her to.

Addison brings her hand to Meredith's mouth, tracing her lips until Meredith parts them. She looks right into Addison's darkened gaze as her tongue peeks out to trace the tips. If Addison wants a show, then Meredith is going to fucking give her one. She takes one in, softly sucking, and then the other. Addison gives her one more and Meredith's head bobs as she twirls her tongue and sucks.

She swallows a grin when she feels Addison lightly shift. Her fingers pull out with a _pop_. Meredith lets out a gasp as Addison’s hand moves down and _finally_ enters her. She begins thrusting slowly, but deep enough to make Meredith throw her head back in pleasure.

She feels Addison kissing up her body and she groans in relief when her lips latch onto her breast. She nips and sucks and tugs, and her fingers increase their pace punishingly so until Meredith is panting against her hair.

She feels her abdomen tighten, the slick sounds of Addison fucking her into oblivion spurring her on.

"Don't you dare, not until I tell you so," Addison hisses sharply, yet her pace doesn't slow.

Meredith whines. She opens her eyes to look at Addison and takes in her dark eyes and cheeks flushed with arousal.

She's ready to beg Addison to let her come, anything to- oh, fuck, she feels a third finger enter her. She softens her speed, but she's relentless and Meredith doesn't know how long she can hold on, not with the way Addison is watching her like she's something _sacred_ , not with how Addison knows every little secret to her body by now, every tug and thrust that makes her scream.

She looks up and the sight alone of Addison above her, with her flushed chest and her skirt bunched up around her thighs, is enough to make Meredith go insane. Sometimes, she wonders if she already is. It would certainly explain why she keeps coming back, why she keeps risking her difficultly restored normalcy.

Addison twists and opens her fingers and Meredith lets out a whine that sounds so fucking needy that she wants to slap herself. She feels a gush of wetness escape as she clenches.

"I think you can take another," Addison looks down at her.

Meredith pulses around her fingers, groaning softly. She doesn't think she can, not when she's this full already, "Addison, I can't- I'm-"

"Yes, you can," Addison pushes a tendril of hair away from Meredith's face, "Breathe with me."

Meredith nods jerkily. She lets out a soft cry as another finger stretches her. She reaches out for Addison's shoulders to pull her closer when Addison suddenly stops moving. Meredith groans in frustration because _fuck, no, sorry,_ she'll keep her hands to herself as long as Addison keeps going.

Addison begins slowly withdrawing her fingers, _no, no, please, no,_ Meredith hears herself beg, but Addison shushes her with a kiss to her temple and guides her body until she's lying on her left side and Addison is spooning her.

 _Oh._ She hooks Meredith's leg over hers so she's wide open for her again. This is better, _Oh God,_ this is so much better because Addison is warm against Meredith's back and her voice is velvet in her ear.

She feels Addison shift behind her. Meredith turns her head to see her leaning over to open a drawer and taking out a tube. _Oh, God. Oh, fuck._ Meredith feels herself clench as she watches her pour it over her hand. Their eyes meet and Addison smiles, the kind that once made Meredith's blood boil but now just makes her want to drop to her knees and bury her face between Addison's legs.

She groans as Addison enters her again, but she's so slick she hardly feels it. _God,_ she needs more. She's ready.

She hooks her leg up higher, opening herself up further and Addison groans. Meredith feels the tip of her thumb enter and Meredith focuses on keeping her breathing in check. One hand grips the duvet so tightly that she's afraid she might tear it and the other grabs at Addison's thigh where her skirt has risen up. Meredith feels a burst of relief at being allowed to touch her.

"You're doing so good," Addison murmurs in her ear and Meredith keens.

"I- I- Oh fuck, Addison- please" Meredith sobs. She feels knuckles pushing into her body and her thighs shake with the effort to fight giving into onslaught of sensation.

"Not yet, baby," Addison replies as she slowly, oh so gently moves her hand. _Baby,_ her mind reels. She's too overwhelmed by the sudden fullness, the slight burn as her body stretches and clenches, but _God, fuck,_ yes, she wants to be Addison's baby.

She suddenly wonders if Addison brings other women here, if she holds them and whispers sweet nothings while fucking them into another dimension. It's not like this thing is exclusive, Addison can very well sleep with whomever she so pleases. Meredith feels a searing hot surge of rage at the thought regardless.

Addison twists her hand just so, and the rage is instantly replaced with ecstasy because Meredith is the one here right now. She is one feeling the silk of Addison's shirt against her back, the one consumed by the scent of her perfume and the jasmine of her hair. She is the one with Addison's fucking _hand_ inside her.

Addison stops moving, and Meredith writhes at the way she's so completely filled up. _God,_ she fucking loves this. She fucking loves everything Addison does to her. Sometimes, she thinks she loves _her_ , but that is a scary thought and Meredith doesn't think she can take another unrequited love. Sometimes, when it's dark in her room or she's surrounded by steam in her shower, she thinks she might've loved Addison since the night she walked into Meredith's life and flipped it upside down.

She’s never met a woman like Addison, Meredith thinks as Addison twists her wrist and hits a spot that makes Meredith shake. Meredith turns to look at Addison's flushed cheeks and dazed eyes. Addison kisses her softly, licking the seam of her lips, coaxing them into parting. Meredith's neck hurts and her thighs will be sore for days but it's fucking okay because this is worth it and more. She feels a flutter at the gentleness of Addison's lips against hers, the firm, reassuring grip of her arms around her and the steadily increasing pace of her fist inside her.

 _Fuck_ , she is used to hard, quick sex, enjoys it, really. She likes riding and talking dirty and fast-paced orgasms. She isn’t used to _this,_ letting another person completely consume her. She fucks her girls, _she_ makes them shake and squirm and beg. And yet, here she is in an expensive hotel room, curled into Addison’s chest, begging her to let her come.

"Addison, I can’t hold on- _please,_ I need to- _Oh._ ” 

“I know, baby,” Addison murmurs against Meredith’s lips. "You can let go now."

It takes a flick of her thumb against her clit and she is gushing onto Addison's palm, down her arm, _fuck_ and a flush of embarrassment at her desperation, at the mess she's making, at this whole fucking situation takes over her. She's wrecked the sheets and she’s certain she screamed Addison’s name and every person in this hotel probably knows what goes on in this room by now, but her head is too clogged with endorphins to be bothered. She takes a deep breath, exhaling slowly as Addison slows down her thrusts to bring Meredith down from her high. 

"That's it, good girl, you did so well," Addison coos in her ear as she gently withdraws her hand. Meredith feels a swell of joy, almost pride, as Addison whispers sweet nothings in her ear. 

She laments the sudden emptiness as her body clenches involuntarily and she shifts a little, just enough to stop crushing Addison's left arm under her and instead letting her move it so it cushions Meredith's head instead. Addison pushes away the sweaty, blonde locks sticking to Meredith’s forehead and presses a soft kiss to her temple. Meredith sighs contentedly. 

They lie in comfortable silence as Meredith’s heart rate returns to normal. She glances at Addison’s chest, splotched with red (Her shirt must’ve untied on its own during all the wiggling Meredith did against it, she realizes amusedly) and her hiked up skirt and if she weren’t absolutely worn out, she’d act on the faint pulse she feels between her legs. 

She’s twirling a strand of Addison’s hair around her finger when she hears her say something about a shower.

“I can’t move,” she groans, “It’s your own fault.”

“You’re sticky and my clothes are stuck to my back,” Addison retorts amusedly, “Come on.”

"Addison, it's not every day a girl gets a double board certified fisting,” Meredith cheekily grins at her, “Give me a second.”

Addison laughs and her cheeks turn adorably pink. Meredith’s heart flutters at the sight.

****

"Come here," Addison says when Meredith steps inside the fogged up glass. She joins Addison under the water, groaning in relief as it hits her back. She hears Addison chuckle lightly and Meredith opens her eyes to give her a smile.

The scent of her shampoo fills the air as Addison squeezes some into her palm. Meredith is about to take the bottle for herself when Addison puts it back.

"Here, let me," she offers. Meredith silently nods. 

Her eyes flutter shut as Addison begins gently massaging her scalp. Meredith cannot remember the last time someone washed her hair. She leans into Addison’s touch and it hits her that she’ll smell like Addison after this. Some rational part of her brain knows the risk of it, knows she’ll get caught, but she doesn’t fucking care. Part of her wants to get caught, wants this whole thing to blow up and everyone’s hands to be revealed but no, she cares too much about Addison to ever let that happen.

She tells herself she’ll take a shower with her own shampoo later. Right now, she wants to smell like Addison, wants every part of her with herself.

The tiles are cool against her back and the water is soothingly warm on her belly. Addison bends down to gently run a washcloth between Meredith's legs and Meredith suddenly wants to _cry._ She swallows down the urge to and closes her eyes instead. She relishes in the feel of Addison's palm on her thigh. Fuck, she just wants to stay here and let Addison touch her forever. 

Addison rises and pulls her under the water. She envelopes Meredith in her arms. Meredith feels a dull throb when their breasts press against each other but she's still too exhausted to do something about it. Besides, this is so good already, standing flush against Addison, safe in her arms as her hands softly scratch the back of Meredith’s head as the water rinses away the soap and shampoo. 

This is dangerous and Meredith knows it. Addison probably does too, but Addison isn’t the one lying to all her friends and Addison isn’t the one in a (sort-of) relationship and Addison won’t have to come up with a fake story about her mother’s health when she goes home.

Addison will go to sleep in this lonely, fabulous room alone. Meredith feels a pang of sadness at the thought but she knows Addison doesn't want sleepovers and pillow talks. Part of her wonders if this some fucked up ploy to get back at Derek, if Meredith is just another pawn in a bigger game Addison is playing. 

But then Addison pulls back and looks at her, almost like she read Meredith’s thoughts, and her pretty green eyes crinkle as she smiles. Meredith instantly feels guilty as she takes in her earnest expression and chucks the ugly thought right out of her mind.

Whatever this is, they’re in it together, she thinks as she steps out of the shower behind Addison and wraps herself in the fluffy robe she hands her. She feels Addison cautiously reach for her hand, intertwining their fingers as they walk back to the bed.

Meredith feels herself flush at the stain on the duvet and Addison gives her a mischievous smile as they strip the bed down to its (thankfully clean) sheet.

Addison lies down and Meredith joins her. She inhales the jasmine of her neck and for the next few minutes (hours) Meredith will pretend that this is real, that she isn't lying to every fucking person she cares about, that she isn't the only one being driven completely insane by this, and hope that Addison will ask her to stay. (She knows she won’t, she knows she’ll get up once Addison is asleep, dress up, pick up her bag, kiss Addison’s forehead and quietly slip out.)

She shuts her eyes anyways, tightens her arm around Addison’s waist and pretends Addison loves her too.

**Author's Note:**

> Just pretend I'm not ignoring my WIPs and posting plotless porn. I'm actually super busy with real life rn but I'll be updating 'the seven stages of intoxication' soon, I promise. Until then, lmk if you liked this and if you have any requests/prompts, feel free to drop those down below too :)))


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